The Teacher

Lesson 16: if your gaydar goes off, he’s probably, at least, bisexual.

The Teacher was cuuuuuuute. He met ALL my requirements and then some: cute, funny, clean, smart, went to school where my family is from, sociable, sweet.

The first night we hung out, we watched planes take off and land near an airport and listened to music and talked about random shit. Pretty good first date. Nothing sexual but definitely some cuddling.

During the first date, he talks about his mentor and how he’s been great helping him with teaching and life in general. His mentor is able to calm him down when he’s stressed and they spend quite a lot of time together. He tells me that some of his friends think his mentor is gay and has a thing for him but that he isn’t sure. Goes on to talk about how they go hiking, he takes him out to dinner, buys him groceries…

What?! Whatever.

Second date he comes to my place and we hang out for a bit and then have sex. The sex was okaaayyyy. I told him that I was just starting my period so it was light but definitely there but he still wanted to go for it so whatever. He’s kinda awkward during sex and couldn’t really maintain tempo which made it difficult for me. Anyway. After we are through, he’s freaking out because of the blood. 

What the fuck.

We just discussed that but whatever. Then he’s on his phone. Then he passes out. I’m like… okaaaayyyyy.

So I called him out on the weirdness and he’s all “sorry babe, I guess I was just super tired”. Okay.

We hang out again, I’m just getting off work so I haven’t had time to freshen up. He wants to grab food and drinks so I’m like okayyyy. I get to his place and he’s prettier than I am and I’m not dealing with that shit. He dresses down a little bit and we go out. We go to this cute rooftop bar and he keeps turning around to see the “skyline”. no sex because I learned my lesson there, but we stay up talking and laughing and it’s cute. I leave the next morning, write a cute note, and go to work.

That day, one of his friends invites him for a ride on her boat. Okay, cool. I’m having a mani and pedi date with my cousin so idgaf. He tells his mentor and apparently he gives him the third degree for going out on the lake with her. Why??? Why would a professional mentor give a flying fuck about who you are hanging out with?

At any rate. I invite him to go on the lake with me and a few of my cousins. He blends in, we have fun, great.

We get back to his place and he’s talking about how my cousin is pretty but “jeez, those stretch marks. That’s what I worry about with my wife having kids”. 

😶

What?!

The next day we have fun but I gotta get back home. When I’m leaving he says “my mentor is coming over, I gotta hide that note you left me so he doesn’t give me a hard time about it”.

Okay. What the hell is going on? The dude gives you a hard time when you’re in your thirties about seeing women? He takes you to dinner? He buys you groceries? What in the world is going on? 

Maybe he’s not bisexual or gay or anything. Everything is just really weird. Super shallow (most women come with stretch marks 🙄). Very vocal about appearance. Very OCD (I left the toilet seat lid up one time and caught shit but he leaves the cap off of his toothpaste. Ew.). Shitty credit. MEAN sarcasm. The list goes on. And I just canNOT get over the relationship between him and his mentor. I just feel like something is there. Tried to tell me how I needed to grow my hair out because he likes long hair (I’ll cut my hair the moment you try to tell me what to do). Tell me where I need to get tattoos. Boy, fuck off.

Lesson? Don’t let boys be fucking rude – no matter how cute he may be. Put him in his fucking place and carry on with yo cute self 😽

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